| my heart sleeps as i watch the stars move |
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Thursday, July 11, 2002 so how was my day yesterday? oh the usual, you know, decided to go to the goodwill store (my second time to a goodwill store ever) thinking i'd find a cool belt or watch or something. no, not that at all. i found a very cool electric organ. yep yep folks, i, theresa tran, own an organ. i met up with a friend of mine who happened to be in the neighborhood and he just kept saying, 'you own an organ.' and the whole way home, i was just saying to myself, what am i doing with an organ? what are my parents gonna say? what am i going to do with an organ and where am i going to put my organ? considering all the mess in my house, we managed to fit it into a tight space in the already overstuffed garage. wow, it hasn't sunken in. i have an electric organ. hmm...what the heck?!?after the goodwill store, my friend and i went to all these pawn shops and thrift stores down harbor. then we went to downtown fullerton where we went to more pawn shops and found this very cool music store. we spent the longest time in there. it was very cool. then we went into a vintage clothing shop and i found this very cool jacket! i'm so excited. yesterday was a great day. we also went by the hub in fullerton. that is a very cool hangout place. bands often play there and they have old school archade machines. i need to take people with me next time. i'd think they'd like it. fullerton is great. i'm beginning to appreciate the fact that i go to csuf now and i know more of fullerton and the people around there. very cool people. downtown fullerton is very cool. Wednesday, July 10, 2002 NAME 3 FOODS YOU REGULARLY EAT:food? del taco's spicy jack chicken casadilla cereal NAME 3 DRINKS YOU REGULARLY DRINK: water juice soda (preferably sprite) NAME 3 OF THE WORST RECORDINGS YOU OWN: i don't buy many cds. i tend to burn a lot of them. thank you for the internet. so i don't really have any bad cd's. my sister has nsync... NAME 3 ICE CREAM FLAVORS YOU LOVE mint 'n chip baby! chocolate? who doesn't love chocolate strawberry NAME 3 THINGS CURRENTLY ATTACHED TO YOUR BODY: what do you mean attached? my arms? my legs? i'm wearing my pjs right now. my earings? glasses NAME 3 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT YOUR FAMILY: my mom is taller than my dad my sister is almost as tall as i am my sister is stronger than i am...so sad NAME 3 COLORS YOU LOVE: blue red green NAME 3 ITEMS IN YOUR BAG: wallet (must have that) cell keys papers from school a bunch of melee stickers and a bunch of melee buttons, all from allison. thanks yo! but now what do i do with all the buttons/pins. i call them buttons, people call them pins...whatever i know it said 3 items, but i have the most random junk in my bag NAME 3 ITEMS YOU REQUIRE EVERYDAY: since i'm blogging right now, my blog music recess <--the cartoon. i love that show! NAME 3 BAD HABITS YOU HATE PEOPLE DOING: flaking out. tardiness cussing NAME 3 BAD HABITS YOU POSSESS: complaining a lot being too carefree that it seems like i don't care about others...but i do! i worry a lot, i just don't show it. worrying NAME 3 THINGS YOU ENJOY: listening and singing to music in my car. alone. hanging out with friends that i adore making people happy. yes folks, i'm up again at 4 in the morning. and i've already gone to bed! i can't sleep again. this is getting ridiculous! 3 nights in a row, i've had sleepless sleep (if that makes any sense) Tuesday, July 09, 2002 i'm looking back at my blogs the last few weeks, it's getting way to personal. i'm reminding myself that i had wanted to keep things simple, so here goes!i had work yesterday morning, then went to occ to drop my class because the class that i was taking doesn't transfer or fullfill any of my requirements. dumb! i should have jsut taken a class at csuf. it would've been easier and there would've been no possible way of signing up for the wrong class. but now i have to sell my book that i had paid 40 bucks for and i'll probably get 5 dollars back. stupid! i had work again this morning. i was hoping to work tomorrow too, but she's coming in late tomorrow so she doesn't need me. now what do i do?!? good thing i will be working another job. i can't work only 2 days a week! the piano studio is only open mon through wednesday during hte summer. i need to find somehting to do! now that i don't have my summer class anymore. i need to stay occupied and busy! i wrote this yesterday 7/8/02 around 10:15p.m. i didn't really feel like going online... my throat is starting to hurt. i don't know what it's from. i really don't feel like getting sick right now. i couldn't sleep last night. i woke up at 1 and couldn't sleep till 3:30. gosh, do you know how frustrating it is when you can't fall back asleep?!? i kept on thinking about things and i couldn't fall back to sleep. you know how when you have things on your mind or you think about things you can't sleep? well it's like that for me. i have to clear my mind before i go to bed. that's why i write in this blog. i was thinking about my grandma. i saw her on the 4th. she's so weak now. she starting to forget things. she would ask us our name, and then 2 minutes later ask again. it's hard. before when she couldn't hear to well or see too well, all we had to do was come closer to her and speak loudly and she'd recognize us and start talking to us. but now she doesn't even remember us. she's so weak too. she needs help walking around and she always used to be so strong. a few years ago, she'd take the bus to go visit her children and grandchildren. going from newport all the way to santa ana, or even fullerton. she used to do yardwork when she lived at my house. i think my grandma is 87 years old now. that's old. my dad may lose his job and i just realized that that would mean he'd lose his income and that's half of my families' income. that's a lot dude! and he's so close to getting retirement money and all the benefits. 3 more years. but if they fire him, he won't get any of that and he's been working there for almost 20 years. all that work for nothing. tey were saying they may have to sell their land that they have in dana point. they used to dream of building their dream house there, but then they found this house. they used to dream of keeping that land for us, so that we can one day build our own dream house. they've had the land for 12 or so years. all this time and now they may have to sell it?!? Sunday, July 07, 2002 a friend of mine has been writing songs and so we had been practicing the songs together at school, but since the music building is closed during the summer, we haven't been able to practice. we finally got together today and we've been working on the songs all day. boy, do i need to practice. it was interesting that right when he went home, the occurances of the past few days came back. i started thinking about things again, but all day everything but music was on my mind. so now, i 'm writng in my blog to clear my head. i haven't been to mass in the longest time. it's just that sometimes "personal issues" (as my friend likes to use as his excuse) gets in the way. for a while there, things were crazy so i didn't feel like i really had any faith in anything. and then when i was over that, i felt that i'm not worthy of going to mass again. i kind of feel like that right now. like i don't deserve to go to mass. i know, i know, there is confession...i don't know.i'm wearing the melee shirt alison gave us. i haven't seen any of the melee people in a while. i haven't seen a lot of other people in a while. i don't know, i'm just so confused! i'm scared and worried too. ok, enough, i'm going to go watch some tv now. I'm a loser And i'm not what I appear to be just a little FYI....ever since i started writing in my blog again, it seems like i always have this urge to write things out because it helps me clear my head. if i don't write what i'm thinking, i start thinking about it a lot and i start talking to myself...(well no, i'm kidding, i don't talk to myself, but i might as well) so writing these useless things down just helps me clear my head and i can get on to other things. you get what i'm saying?? ok, now i'm closing my eyes and writing this becuase i am sleepy. good night. got home just as the clock struck midnight. i'm tired and sleepy and i'm going to bed but my sister was online so i jumped in to write this and post my thoughts for the day up. so here's what i was writing/thinking earlier but didn't post online: (it's boring and lame and i don't know, that's just what i was feeling earlier today. but now i'm too tired to rewrite it or write something else... ahh, i'm so tired. maybe it's because i just finished washing my dad's car, inside and out, after going to costco for my mom. yesterday i went over to my cousins' house and we took the little kids to go see lilo and stitch. that was a good movie. it was cute. i've been doing some thinking lately (especially in the shower. i don't know why, but that's where i seem to do most of my thinking. go figure.) anyways, i've just been thinking about things that have been going on lately and i'm just...well i'm just tired of having to think so much. and i'm confused and well i hope things turn out well. i try not to think about these things that i'd rather not say, but it gets me down. ahhh... <--that's a sigh, if you didn't get it. i've really been frustrated with my sister lately. i've been trying to talk to her and explain to her that she needs to be helping out more around the house. she's old enough that i shouldn't have to explain it to her, but she just doesn't get it. my parents are under enough stress as it is, they don't neeed to be telling her to do her chores over and over. i feel like it's my fault when she doesn't do things she's told to do. i feel like i'm responsible, as if i'm suppoose to be the one "in charge" of her, but she just doesn't listen and i'm just so frustrated and tired of this. i'm trying, but she just doesn't listen! i spent all morning doing errands for my mom. went to the bank, went to costco, went to wash my dad's car, and went home and did stuff around the house. then in the afternoon went over to cliff's cousins' house for his cousin's birthday. i'm tired, i will write later yesterday, went to my cousins' again. hung out there. took the little kids to go see lilo and stitch. very cute movie. i liked it. after, went back and my older cousin made us spaggetti. it was good. or maybe because i haven't had real home cooked meals in so long. i don't know when our kitchen or house is going to be done. |
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about me! links Vanessa archives 06/09/2002 - 06/16/2002 taggie here credits original layout w4rnawarni : listen to the music designed by w4rnawarni @ blogskins |